"The Drippen," by Edgar Jay Markanich (A Sad Tale Of Gutter Drip Woes)
Once upon a midday dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore—
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping, dripping on the front porch floor.
“’Tis some visitor,” I muttered, “dripping on the front porch floor —
Only this and nothing more.”
Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak September;
And each separate dying dripper wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow — sadly I had to report the sorrow,
On my long report to borrow—terse words for the poor Sellor —
For the rare and radiant listing, whom the MLS calls Sellor —
Nameless here for evermore.
And the drippen very certain, reported later most determined,
Thrilled me—filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still my client's beating, I simply stood again repeating,
“’Tis some visitor dripping on the front porch floor —
Some late visitor dripping on the front porch floor —
This it is and nothing more.”
As we used to say in the playground - gutter, gutter, boo, boo! And then we stuck our tongues out.
My recommendation: look up, look down, look all around - the gutter's dripping down! Or something like that. Whenever you see a wet stain, there is always a source. And while some gutter leaks may wax poetic, they are pretty common for home inspectors to see. Perhaps the future will see this seller sealing the fate of the gutter. We'll wait and see. Only this, and nothing more.
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.
Office (703) 330-6388 Cell (703) 585-7560