So, what do you think? Martian writing or carpenter ant damage?
That was my question! Here I was deep in the woods. It was a careful investigation of a 40 year old log home. It was quiet out there. It was lonely out there. It was far out there. It was the perfect place for space aliens to take up a temporary residence, write their enigmatic messages, and leave, sight unseen.
Yep, just the spot.
The house creaked mysteriously. Things wobbled frightfully. It had ghostly cold spots and unknown smells, perhaps from the Martian aliens themselves. The blowing wind made the shutters shudder. I shuddered when the shutters shuddered. I was all out of sorts.
Then I saw it. Was it writing? A message? Codes from another place in space? A, umm, gulp, a warning? Whoa, from Martians?
Intentional scrapings and carvings.
They were there!
For all to see! A written script.
And THEEEEYYYY wanted us to see the writing.
What are the marks saying?
I contacted my first Internet date (really, he was), Charlie Buell, sent him these photographs of this ancient script, with the question, "Waddat?"
The answer was simple:
Have you ever looked into the face of a carpenter ant?
Well, it is a horror, I can tell you.
No doubt they were patterned after Martian space aliens.
No doubt they are spies placed here by Martian space aliens.
No doubt they write messages from Martian space aliens.
I think the messages are disguised to look like carpenter ant damage.
I think we should take heed, crack the code and save ourselves.
I think we should abandon our cars and run down the highway in senseless and inexplicably huge groups. (I'm not sure why, I just see it a lot in the movies)
My recommendation: it doesn't hurt to ask questions. It doesn't hurt to get answers. In fact it's good! And abandoning your car along with thousands of others and running in the same direction down the highway doesn't hurt either. It makes for a good film! A cast of thousands and a host of others and ... well, you know the rest. And as to my first Internet date, he'll never kiss and tell. Really. Ask him.
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.
Office (703) 330-6388 Cell (703) 585-7560