What I'm Seeing Now

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Accept My Recommendation: Don't Cook On This

If you see this in a flip, accept my recommendation:  don't cook on this.

This house was a disaster inside and out - it looked bad, it smelled bad, it was unclean, was full of trash inside and out, and generally beat up.  (It did have a wonderfully polite roof leak however...)

It was as if the seller simply bought the house, literally taped some rolled shingle material on top of the house, and put it on the market to sell at a "profit!"

He does say the kitchen is said to be "Fully Functional!" as if that is a feature or selling point. 

But, um, let's see.

 

This is the "functional" cook top.  The knobs are broken.  The elements are loose and broken and not resting flat.  They bounced up and down!  The pans are rusted.  And the wiring underneath is nothing shy of DANGEROUS.   Yes, that is high-amperage wiring!

Confession here!  Home inspectors go to houses to test stuff!

I DID NOT EVEN TURN THIS BABY ON!

Are you kidding me?  I'm not sacrificing myself on this alter!  This first-born, male, fatted bullock will live to inspect houses another day.

To top it off, touching the tips of some of the breakers in the panel box would make lights in various rooms flicker on and off!  Just touching the tips!  I didn't even take the cover off the panel box!  No way ... remember the fatted bullock comment.

My recommendation:  people are attracted to houses with very low prices.  And this house was priced very low!  The inspection was conducted entirely in Spanish and I understood all the, um, adjectives my client threw out there!  I don't use those words myself, but I understood them.  He even came out with a few adjectives in English, some really good ones that I don't use in that language either!  Sometimes the house deserves all the adjectives it gets ... good or bad.

 

 

Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC  

Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.

Office (703) 330-6388   Cell (703) 585-7560

www.jaymarinspect.com


Comment balloon 25 commentsJay Markanich • January 15 2014 03:14AM

Comments

Good morning, Jay.... the only people who should buy this type of property are those in the trades.... they can barter with others for work to be done...or they can tear it down and build new.... everyone sees dollar signs and they don't know which end is up when looking at this type of work.

Posted by Barbara Todaro, Previously Affiliated with The Todaro Team (RE/MAX Executive Realty - Retired ) about 7 years ago

True, Barbara, if you are in that market.  This house would be exactly that.  I would recommend a couple of bombs - but not insect bombs...

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

Jay - sounds like a disaster.  More than a fixer upper.

Posted by Grant Schneider, Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes (Performance Development Strategies) about 7 years ago

It just saddens me to see property in such a condition. 

Posted by Lenn Harley, Real Estate Broker - Virginia & Maryland (Lenn Harley, Homefinders.com, MD & VA Homes and Real Estate) about 7 years ago

Funny but it all looks familiar to me and the wife.  We clean places like that and nver give it a second thought.  Now we will.

Posted by James Dray, Exceptional Agents, Outstanding Results (Fathom Realty) about 7 years ago

Grant - a fixer upper with epic proportions.

It was awful Lenn.  As I was sitting in the driveway waiting for everyone to arrive different people showed up to look at the house, excited by its price.

It wasn't simply the cleaning James.  And a lot of the odor was generated by the crawl space, which was a lake full of who knows what, but exceptionally smelly.  No, I didn't venture in there either!

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

Sounds like another " Investor" is going to bite the dust. I hope he got a good deal on it!

Posted by Jeff Pearl, Full Service Full Time Realtor (RE/MAX Distinctive / LIC in VA) about 7 years ago

Just looking at the mess on the stove and counter shows that the home is not ready to sell.

Cheap or not, if the seller can't bothered to clean it up and make it presentable then you can beat there are hidden issues.

Posted by Than Maynard, Broker - Licensed to List & Sell - 405-990-8862 (Coldwell Banker Heart of Oklahoma) about 7 years ago

Oh yes, this is really sad.  What the heck were they thinking?

Posted by Debbie Gartner, The Flooring Girl & Blog Stylist -Dynamo Marketers (The Flooring Girl) about 7 years ago

Hi Jay,

Looks like the same electrician that doe's a lotof work around here. Even found brand new homes wired this way.

Good find and good advice.

Have a great day in Bristow.

Best, Clint McKie

Posted by Clint Mckie, Desert Sun Home, Comm. Inspection 1-575-706-5586 (Desert Sun Home, commercial Inspections) about 7 years ago

Good morning Jay,

Sounds like the home with six double-tags in the panel box yesterday.

Wonder when and what price it will sell at!

Make yourself a great day.

Posted by Raymond E. Camp, Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Greater Rochester (Howard Hanna Real Estate Services) about 7 years ago

Jay, this house is a mess! Do you have enough paper to list all the things wrong with it? 

Posted by Tom White, Franklin Homes Realty LLC, Franklin TN (Franklin Homes Realty LLC (615) 495-0752 or www.FranklinHomesRealty.com) about 7 years ago

Now that is a quick flip Jay. I hope the buyer of the home can see that some work still needs to be done here.

Posted by Tom Arstingstall, General Contractor, Dry Rot, Water Damage Sacramento, El Dorado County - (916) 765-5366, General Contractor, Dry Rot and Water Damage (Dry Rot and Water Damage www.tromlerconstruction.com Mobile - 916-765-5366) about 7 years ago

Hi Jay - That looks like someone forgot the "fix" part of fix and flip. What a mess!

Posted by Dick Greenberg, Northern Colorado Residential Real Estate (New Paradigm Partners LLC) about 7 years ago

Jeff - this guy is smoking weird stuff to think he will sell this house.

Than - clean is one thing.  Safe and sound is another!

That someone would see the price and buy it apparently Debbie.  Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain though...

Clint - this stuff is all too common.  And it's sad.

Raymond - I had a box the other day I called "over population."  Might post it!

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

Tom - I processed the tree behind my house to make paper for it.

Just a tad Tom A.  Just a tad.

A whole lot was overlooked Dick.  And dangerously so, throughout the house.

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

It's a home inspectors worst nightmare. How lucky for you!

Posted by Suzanne Otto, Your Montgomery County PA home stager (Six Twenty Designs) about 7 years ago

Gee, Jay, did these buyers go running out of the place when you finished with this inspection?  Maybe they have good fix up skills.

Posted by Patricia Kennedy, Home in the Capital (RLAH Real Estate) about 7 years ago

I don't know if it's the worst Suzanne, but any electrical danger is no fun!

Pat - the buyer is a roofer and was underwhelmed with the roof.  But had no abilities to do the rest, or that much money.  There was nothing Billy could have sold him to make things better.

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

Great opportunity for very few. This is another example why home inspections are important, protecting an unsuspecting buyer.

Posted by Tina Parker, CNE, REDM, SRES, CSP Home Staging REALTOR, Halifax (Keller Williams Select Realty) about 7 years ago

Thanks Tina.  This buyer began suspecting stuff soon after we began!

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

Amazing what "flipper" believes  that anyone will buy at a price...urgh !

Posted by Sally K. & David L. Hanson, WI Real Estate Agents - Luxury - Divorce (EXP Realty 414-525-0563) about 7 years ago

I heard the price and it was pretty low S&D, but the repairs probably outweighed the entire price of the home!

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

Sometimes I have to wonder if people do not have their senses working. If this place is a s bad as you say, why even put in an offer.

Posted by James Quarello, Connecticut Home Inspector (JRV Home Inspection Services, LLC) about 7 years ago

I was shocked that they put a contract on it Jim.  Especially since the buyer is a roofer.  This house has been written about before (polite toilet).

Posted by Jay Markanich, Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia (Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC) about 7 years ago

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