Hi folks! Billy Jays here!
I am so happy to be here to introduce our new product!
No doubt you are like me! We all have houses with windows. And don't those windows have screens? Sure they do!
And how often have you been waken up at night by the banging and pounding of a screen against the window when a stormy wind whips up? Well I know I have!
AND IT CAN BE AGGRAVATING!
Introducing Stick Yer Screen!
Yes, Stick Yer Screen! is guaranteed to stop that banging and shaking forever!
No more getting up at night and thinking about what you can use to stop that banging!
Duct tape? NO WAY! Foam peanuts? NO WAY! A pencil? NO! NO WAY!
Why waste your time on what doesn't satisfy when you can use WHAT DOES SATISFY?
Stick Yer Screen! will ALWAYS satisfy! And it's quick!
Stick Yer Screen! is the most unusual product we have ever come out with!
Just pull a stick of Stick Yer Screen! out of its special, sealing wrapper, and pop it in your mouth!
You say, "Billy, did you say to pop it in my mouth?"
YES! Stick Yer Screen! is the first product we have ever offered that you pop in your mouth. Just chew it up and get it to just the right consistency!
And Stick Yer Screen! is flavored! That's right! You can order Juicy Fruity, Double Minty, Red Hot Cinnamon, Spearmint Leaf, or Orange Julius!
And if you call in the next 20 minutes, cause we can't do this all day, we will double your pleasure and double your fun! That's right! Two sticks of Stick Yer Screen! for the price of one!
I'm feeling crazy enough now to say that if you share Stick Yer Screen! with a friend or neighbor, I will throw in a third piece ABSOLUTELY FREE!
So Call Now!
Call now, and our pleasant phone counselors are waiting to flap their gums and will help you to choose just the right flavors for you! Have your credit card ready and for just $18.88, Stick Yer Screen! will be on its way!
Stick Yer Screen! might start out looking like chewed piece of gum, but in our special Time and Weather Simulation Lab we have determined that this is what Stick Yer Screen! will look like in 13 years!
Still stuck and still working!
Yes, Stick Yer Screen! will stop that screen from banging for decades to come!
And once again, Billy Jays will CHANGE YOUR LIFE! So CALL NOW!
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.
Office (703) 330-6388 Cell (703) 585-7560