Hi folks! It's been a while!
Billy Jays! here! And am I excited to be with you!
If you are like me, and I know you are, you don't like walking out of your house only to see a stream of water coming from the corner of a gutter.
You can only imagine the neighbors' faces as they walk by the house with the dog, looking over, and seeing that little, tinkling, cascade of embarrassment.
Can I be of help?
Of course I can!
I'm Billy Jays!
Well, I could not be prouder to introduce my newest product!
I call it Glop Yer Glop!
Glop Yer Glop! you say?
What could be easier!
And you can do it yourself! Just climb up with a convenient can of Glop Yer Glop! and get to work glopping!
You'll be shocked at how easy it spreads!
Your little, tinkling, cascading embarrassment will cease in a flash! In a flash, I tell you!
Since most gutters are white I decided to make Glop Yer Glop! black! That's right, black!
Why black, Billy, you might ask?
So the neighbors can see that you are a take charge kind of person! You get at it! You get the job done! And you are the definition of a do-it-yourself homeowner!
Even looking out a bedroom window at Glop Yer Glop! you can see how special it is! That is a gutter leak seal you can be proud of!
And trust me when I say it is permanent! That stuff will never come off! You have solved the problem and solved it permanently!
So get on the phone and call one of my glop-trained phone operators and order a case of Glop Yer Glop! now!
And I am so happy and proud to bring you this new product I am offering a free case of Lotsa Nuts! along with a case of my most famous Billy Jays! Hydrogen Dioxide to be included with your order!
SO CALL NOW!
Well, what more can I say to get you to start using my newest, and perhaps greatest, product! Billy Jays! soon to be famous Glop Yer Glop!
So, please, please call now! You may never forgive yourself if you don't!
This is Billy Jays! signing off! And to quote a famous phrase, "I'll be back."
You bet I will!
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Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC
Based in Bristow, serving all of Northern Virginia.
Office (703) 330-6388 Cell (703) 585-7560